Self-Love Is Too Much to Ask

We should love ourselves, but loving yourself is not so easy. Sometimes it grows wearisome to keep loving yourself when no one else will do it for you. The self-help books have distorted the message, and that is why they no longer resonate with us. Kindness toward yourself has a limit. It should carry you only as far as the next stage of your growth. You accept your flaws so that you can become better. To love yourself is asking too much. The goal was never to love yourself. It was to stop hating yourself. To stop being cruel to yourself. To stop waking up every day and saying mean, wounding things to yourself. The self-help books have pushed us to the opposite extreme by insisting that we love ourselves. People with no company in their lives often slide into self-neglect. They don't want to clean their room or look their best. They feel no urge to improve each day, because what is the point? Who is going to admire them? Who is going to notice them? Looking in the mirror every day and…

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