The Love You Were Never Given

When life has been traumatic, there are two directions a person can take. On the first, he wants to pass the hurt on to others. He wants the world to see how hard it was. He becomes the archetypal villain. The grey character. The one you sympathise with yet disagree with, because he too has a point. On the second, the person absorbs everything. He makes sure no one else feels the pain he had to endure. The ignored child grows up to ensure his own child never feels ignored. He makes sure the people around him always feel heard. He suffers inwardly. Outwardly, he keeps doing things for people. Putting them at ease. Making them feel valued. Within, he still yearns for the love he never received. The warmth the world withheld from him. Both kinds of people are suffering. Neither has finished hurting. Their pain simply finds different outlets. And the second kind is far easier to deal with than the first. The first creates problems. The second absorbs them all. The world prefers the second…

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