The Things We Are Not Allowed to Feel

I have always struggled with morality. Not that I am immoral from a societal standpoint. I am amoral—not because I have no morals, but because I don't see morality as absolute. I do have values and principles, and I follow them, but I am not rigid about them. For me, the person matters more than the values we hold. For me, the person matters more than the values we hold. I know I shouldn’t fall in love with someone, but there’s no way in hell I can control who I fall in love with. All I can control is what I do after that. Morals are only useful in the second step. The first, where you fall for someone, is uncontrollable. I can blame myself for falling for someone, but there is absolutely no control over how I feel. If my friend has made a blunder, I wouldn’t be discussing ethics with him. I would first help him out, sort out his issues, and then maybe give him a lecture about what shouldn’t have been done. The first instinct is to protect, to help. Only the person matters; the morals…