Suffering Doesn't Make You Superior

Pain earns compassion. It does not earn a claim on other people. When someone tells you about their suffering, compassion comes naturally. A man gives twelve hours a day to his job while his personal life falls apart, and his boss says there is nothing special about that. Another man takes care of everyone at home, and no one there cares how he feels or whether he exists at all. You listen, and you want to help. But you can only offer so many suggestions. Beyond that, you have no control over their life. Fixing the problem will take a lot of effort, and that effort has to be theirs. So you give what you can. You give empathy. It doesn't take much for that pain to turn into entitlement. "I am suffering, so cut me some slack" is a request for empathy. "I suffered, so I deserve this" is a claim of entitlement. The first one asks. The second one demands. And the demands only get uglier. Soon the pain becomes a reason to make demands and an excuse for everything. Then it becomes a reason…