The Appetite I Lost

My relationship with food has always been hit or miss. I don’t know what to eat. I know how much to eat, thankfully. This has protected me from getting fat. I grew up with very limited options for food; we weren’t that rich. We never had to worry about what to prepare for dinner. The worry was where the food would come from. From that point, I grew up to have abundance. I can have anything I want, from any expensive restaurant I can think of. But the hunger has disappeared. I don’t have any excitement left for food. I treat it as fuel to be consumed because the body requires it to sustain itself. So I eat whenever I can, even when I don’t feel hungry. It’s easy for me to quit junk food because there is no temptation. The age when temptations enter into associative memory was when I was struggling to figure out whether I would get to eat or not. I was training myself to stay hungry so I wouldn’t become a burden on my family. So people who don’t know my past, when they see me without…