The Direction of Need

Expectations are the root cause of suffering, they said. Desire for outcome also brings suffering. Everything you want brings suffering. You talk to someone you want to keep talking to. But if they don't feel that way, or don't feel that strongly, you are finished. You suffer endlessly. Through no fault of your own. Except perhaps the need to connect. Why do we expect, though? Why is there a need for anything? The simple answer is because we are human. Humans have needs. But that's not quite right either. We don't need everything. Some people are obsessed with cars. Others couldn't care less about cars. They crave something else entirely. So the impulse to want is universal. The specific wants are not. Our expectations aren't really about what we need. They are about why we need it. We want a car so we can be considered socially acceptable. We want children so we don't feel left out among friends. We want a partner so we aren't seen as incapable. We want a house because of status. We…