The Siri For Families Apple Will Never Build

The Ternus announcement got me thinking about the one thing I keep wishing Apple would build and almost certainly never will: a family-scoped AI assistant that actually works across all our devices. I don’t mean a frontier model or a “reasoning engine”–just a competent, context-aware agent that understands my family as a unit. The shared calendar, the school schedules, the medication reminders, who’s picking up whom and when. The kind of thing that Apple Intelligence was supposed to be, except pointed at the problem that would actually matter most to the people who are already deep in the ecosystem and paying for it. I am married with two kids. Between us we have more Apple devices than I care to count–and we are exactly the demographic Apple loves to put in keynote photos. And yet iCloud treats us as completely separate customers who happen to share a credit card. Family Sharing is a permissions layer bolted onto individual accounts, and it shows in every single interaction–shared…