I don't feel chemistry with others

As my usual self does, I have done a lot of thinking. A lot of it has been in fear. I fear that the chemistry I experienced with my ex was a one time thing. Rationally I understand that there are so many people I am compatible with, but social interaction and the need for closeness and comfort is such a rare thing for me to FEEL that I want that with a person. It is difficult to establish a connection of that type with someone for me. Just as it is difficult for me to not compare every interaction with any potential partner I have to the one I lost. There are many people in relationships who get tempted, because the grass is greener. Well I guess I was colorblind then, because my grass was green and lucious. I think what hurts me that my partner was not. Even now being single I still feel that same way. I don't want to date. I don't have interest in fleeting, casual relationships. I could if I think about it, but everything seems pointless in comparison to the chemistry and connection…

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