What happens in Vegas

Let me preface today’s Substack by stressing some important points:1. There is NOTHING FUNNY about so-called “pranks” that involve innocent animals. As opposed to, say, cats.2. No, seriously, even cat pranks are not funny.3. All animal pranks are wrong!4. DO NOT DO ANIMAL PRANKS.5. You may think, when you read this Substack, that I made up the event it describes just so I’d have an excuse to, once again, post the Flamingo Man video. That is not the case. The event described herein, and the subsequent trial, actually happened.6. Although I think you’ll have to agree that if ever there was a news story that warranted posting the Flamingo Man video, it is this one.7. But the key point, lest we lose sight of it, is: We are not amused by animal pranks.OK, now to the event. It happened in Las Vegas. It had to. It’s the kind of event that couldn’t happen anywhere but Las Vegas. Here are the facts:On March 2 of this year, a 33-year-old man named Mitchell Fairbarn was in Las Vegas for ConExpo,…