Mountain Dew

The USA is mostly batshit crazy: We have experts. They always have something to say. Quite rightly too. As for the colour of Mountain Dew, all I know is that it came in a number of different colours - at one time anyway. Most of them were quite bright. Lurid even. Possibly disgusting. Why drink that stuff?Kids like it. I have personal experience.Is it actually for sale on this septic isle these days? I think a ban would be in order. Outlaw it, quickly. Along with any other things that are too bold or vivid to be safely ingested. It's for the common good ... but that's a fine and disturbing line to take.So don't worry about the colour of your neon urine (thinking of mainly male health problems here). It's a tone thing. When you reach a certain age you're glad if you can just painlessly and smoothly produce the amber nectar at the required point of delivery. Don't forget to wash your paws afterwards either and always open the toilet door "hands free" using only your Swiss Army Knife.