weekly retro #90: shouts out to joan

this year i'm hosting friendsgiving and for the first time in years i managed to order a tofurkey roast in time. i spent $39 for it to be shipped in a cold pack quickly. the night it is supposed to be delivered i get a call from a man in a high rise a mile away from me. he says my boxes was delivered to him and that he'd leave it at the front desk for me to get. it was dusk, i was not walking a mile to a strange building, this was bullshit. i paid $39. i call and the concierge, joan, picks up. in her raspy voice she tells me the story like she's summarizing her favorite mystery novel to me. "why would someone send me vegan things" she said the man had exclaimed to her. i told her i'd be there first thing in the morning to pick up the package, and then first thing in the morning i made the mile long trek before any coffee to get my box. it's not recently been a safe area i was walking through, and i knew i wasn't built at that moment to be robbed at gunpoint over a box of fake fucking…