two beers and a puppy

A few days ago I saw a post on Instagram about a simple test to figure out how you actually feel about someone: “two beers and a puppy” test. It was invented by Ross McCammon in his book, which has a ridiculously long subtitle: Works Well with Others: An Outsider’s Guide to Shaking Hands, Shutting Up, Handling Jerks, and Other Crucial Skills in Business That No One Ever Teaches You. Two Beers and and a puppy” is a test I developed while working on the Esquire story on the American “son of a bitch.” The test is: In order to find out how you actually feel about someone, ask yourself: “Would I have two beers with this person?” And: “Would I allow this person to look after my puppy over a weekend?” Some people are no and no. These people are to be avoided at all costs. Some people are yes and no. These people are two be cautiously trusted. Some people are no and yes. These people are no fun but they make the world a better place — for puppies, especially. And some people are yes and yes.…