Front Mission 1st Remake

Small preamble to this review: While the Switch does not meet my definition of a “Retro” console, it has several games that are “new ports” of retro games. Lots of these ports manage to do small updates without butchering the core gameplay of the original (like Bayonetta or DKC Returns). I was hoping Front Mission would be like that, but it isn’t… exactly… I got the digital version of this on a huge sale for 49 cents. Before I start doing all the coping and seething for the whole rest of this review, I would like to say that it is worth the 49 cents. Not sure I’d go much higher, but I can’t say it’s a bad value. That out of the way, this particular Switch release has to be the worst possible way to play this game. The good is that it is essentially just a coat of paint on the SNES original (which I believe was never officially translated to English). But, instead of bringing tiny modern improvements around the edges, it brings modern problems, constantly. Allegedly, the Nintendo DS…