The Shoelace Diploma

It was the fourth time I’d had to tie my shoelace in the barely three hours since I left my house. Frustration had me cursing at my shoe, mostly because it was better to be mad at it than at myself. Still, it got me thinking about my inadequacies, particularly the minuscule things I’m grossly incompetent at. Earlier that morning, I had watched Daan tie his shoelace most fascinatingly. I’d probably need to watch YouTube videos on repeat and practice for two months to pull off anything that good, so of course I complimented him on it. He barely looked up as he tied the other shoe. With that smile in his voice he always seems to have, he asked, “What do you mean? You mean you never learned how to tie your shoelaces like this?” I said no. I offered a half-shrug and replied, “I’m really great and amazing (I know, I compliment myself a lot, because if I don’t, who will?) at a lot of things, but I’m just unable to tie my shoelaces decently.” He said, “This is the first diploma you get in…