On the Western Mass. Lesbian Bar Controversy

I said I was going monogamous with a man, but we agreed that he wouldn’t get his vagina surgically turned into a penis because I wasn’t going to break my vow of never sucking dick. As for monogamy, both me and my partner don’t want any mid- to long-term partners aside from each other, but we still have a hang for orgies, so we reshuffle the pseudo-polycule for our orgies every other week. This way, we stay monogamous except where monogamy is annoying (in bed). To do that, we’ve both become regular customers at Last Ditch, one of the few lesbian bars in Greenfield. Of course, I live in Greenfield, Massachusetts! Where else would a hypersexual lesbian live in the red, white, and blue eagle nation? Activities at Last Ditch include regular old drinking for easing you into the Greenfield lesbian scene, but the highlights take place in a secret basement for Satanic rituals and mock blood sacrifices that only the realest of Last Ditchters are allowed to partake in. There are initiation…

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