The internet police lie in wait

You’re driving along the information superhighway when suddenly you hear a siren, so you pull over. It’s the internet police. The officer gets out and comes over to your window. “What seems to be the problem, officer?” “I had to pull you over because I noticed you used the word ‘lay’ incorrectly in one of your blog posts. “You wrote that you were going to ‘lay low over the weekend’ when you should have written ‘lie low.’ Lay is a transitive verb, which means you’re doing something to something else. Examples would be ‘lay some bricks’ or ‘lay an egg.’ If you’re doing something on your own, you need an intransitive verb — in this case ‘lie.’ You can ‘lie on the couch,’ for example, or ‘lie low.’ “Every time I see someone write ‘lay’ when they mean ‘lie,’ I wonder what it is they are laying. So when you wrote ‘lay low,’ I had crazy thoughts about you laying some low bricks. “When Bob Dylan sings, ‘Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big, brass bed,’ I ask myself what she could possibly be…