The unbearable lightness of one more index

Being "the database guy" comes with a lot of questions, and over the last eight months those questions changed. The repetitive ones disappeared, nobody asks how to avoid putting things in the database any more, and the code arriving for review got noticeably more polished. Then this summer a schema landed in front of me with twelve proposed index drops on a single table, which is when I started assuming coding agents over-index. The next schema I looked at had the same shape. Passing this off as AI slop would be too easy, because most of those changes were competent. So I built a harness and measured it. I loaded 30 model-generated schemas into PostgreSQL and audited 838 indexes across twelve of them. The competence caught me off guard. Only ten served no requirement I could find; the rest showed solid craft. All four models handled GIN and GiST indexes cleanly, built partial indexes with sensible predicates, and got multi-tenant composite keys in the right order. The baseline SQL…