Define yourself or someone else will do it for you

I grew up an only child and spent many formative hours alone. I learned to occupy myself by playing with action figures, learning magic tricks, and growing vegetables (in Harvest Moon 64). My mind was a cozy place. There were no siblings to fight with, so I could afford to take my time thinking and speaking. There was no pressure to stick my hand out and have an opinion, even if only to preempt or oppose a rival. As I grew up, this tendency to ruminate became an obstacle to acting decisively or forming opinions. I hovered around the edges of political debates because I never felt like I had enough information to make a compelling argument. I read endless product reviews and seemed to suffer from buyer's remorse before even making a purchase. I could usually talk myself through tough moments in life, so there wasn't much incentive to reach out. I rarely confided in others. The answer to this or that anxiety was a few logical steps away, and it was only a matter of discipline to apply…