find the sun, wherever you are

I almost didn't make it out of bed yesterday. A day of failures - a disappointing interview, a missed therapy session - and periods of sleep in between. I almost rescheduled on my friend. But I had not seen her in months, and I missed her dearly. The house, as I left, was awash in the full piercing greys and blacks of shadow. Clouds tarped over the sun and the sky, draining everything of its color. But as I went further and further away, those dull grays parred to reveal the most beautiful paintings of blue and yellow and orange. The sun had only just begun to set, and it accompanied me in my drive. All throughout my time with my friend, walking and chatting, me fumbling around with the last of my smokes, eating Chinese food a few blocks away from her work, I could not help but notice how beautiful it was outside. And it made me quite glad that I had left. I had not intended to, but I sought out the sun, like a plant reaching through a windowsill, and it answered like it always does.…