140 - sleepless

this is the second night in a row that i havent been able to relax and fall asleep i forgot to take part of my meds last night and i thought that was the cause of it, but everything is normal tonight. except that i'm still awake. i was tired. i was sitting at my desk, trying to stay up a little longer, and gradually falling asleep there but as soon as i lay down all the demons come out and Get Me can't stop thinking. dreaming. wondering. worrying. reliving. inventing. i'm starting to hear things. last night it was a high pitched ringing in my left ear, and this morning it was still there. like an electrical whine, but always on my left side no matter where i was now i can hear the mechanical ticking of the little timer in my oil heater. it's distinctive, the same note over and over except occasionally one of them will rise a fraction. it's annoying. i wear headphones whenever my heater is running, to drown it out. it's annoying right now. the heater isnt on. its not even plugged in.…