a quick update

just a quick update about how it’s going… I’ve started working again this week after a 2 week holiday break and it has been HARD. I’m still waiting for my rheumatology appointment on the 1st of September and am trying to get through the days on 600mg ibuprofen (2 times a day). on the days I’m home I can sort of manage because there’s room to rest a little bit. on workdays there’s not. and it’s killing me. I feel like the only thing I do is work and sleep. the pain builds up during the day and around 4 it gets unbearable. then I still have 2 hours of work left that I have to get myself through. now that my knees have started to hurt too, it’s almost impossible to stand all day. those last hours are the part of each day that I hate the most. I really love my job. it’s really my dreamjob. but I have been secretly wishing that my only purpose in life is lie on the couch and do nothing. because everything takes so much energy and there’s pain that I can’t carry. when I come home I can’t…