Living with it

People look at you differently once they know you’ve hurt yourself badly enough that some part of it can never be undone. Even when everything has healed and you’re doing better, there’s sometimes this hesitation that wasn’t there before, like they’re still waiting to see whether something is wrong, I understand where it comes from, especially when there are consequences that aren’t going to disappear with time, but it’s difficult knowing that something from one terrible period can change the way people see you long after that period has ended. there’s also a strange difference between being physically healed and actually being past something, eventually the appointments become less frequent, everything stops being new, and you learn how to live around whatever cannot be repaired. Other people don’t necessarily move on at the same speed, sometimes they become more careful with you, sometimes they ask questions without really asking them and sometimes you can simply tell by the way…