Why would you want to?

Sometimes, in conversation, someone will say a word or phrase and immediately follow it up with “Oh, I guess we’re not allowed to say that.” Usually it’s something racial, but it might also refer to sex or gender. I’m never sure how to respond. I mean, why would you want to, even if you were “allowed”? If you know that a group of people prefers to be called a certain thing, why wouldn’t you do them courtesy of using that word? If you know that some people find a word offensive, why wouldn’t you have the decency not to use it? They aren’t necessarily being malicious — they may be genuinely confused by a seemingly endless parade of words going in and out of fashion. Life would be easier if they could blurt out whatever comes to mind. I can still remember the first time I saw pronouns in an email signature. It was baffling. Even after it was explained to me, I had a feeling of the world changing too fast for my comfort. Still, it provides insight into the dilemma many people feel, and…