I am the luckiest person alive because I exist

Sometimes, I am overwhelmed by the sheer amount of existence and possibilities happening all around me. My friends are leading their own lives: one recently started a new job, another is testing the waters for a side hustle. A high-school classmate got engaged, and another is experiencing the heartache of her life (a five-year relationship!). In their eyes, I'm probably someone trying to navigate her first big girl job post-graduation. This might read like a stream of consciousness, but it's intentional. Particularly with my recent blogposts, I felt I've been unconsciously trying to fit my ideas into a neat, four-paragraphed shape. I never felt the need to come to a digestible conclusion with my writing, and usually I let myself explore every untangled thought to where it takes me. So, I wonder where this intruding pressure of being "easy to digest" is coming from. Probably myself - and if I'm the one who made it up, then I'm also one with full autonomy to unmake it, too. We have so…