Wanting to be known but not by who knows you

I'll be honest, the topic of this blog comes from a shame I feel in... Yearning for attention without knowing how to play it off in a way that still gives me what I want. Bit of a word salad there, hope you get what I mean. It's also worth me noting that I don't want to bog anyone down with the nuclear-level self-loathing I'll be exploring in this post. If you're participating in Blaugust, Augustory1 or are just a blogger yourself, don't let this post make you feel bad for actually enjoying the craft. This is just a retrospective of some insecurities I've largely grown out of. In reading other peoples' Augustories,2 I noticed a lot of them started out young, out of a legitimate passion for writing what came to mind or what otherwise mattered to them most. I, on the other hand, historically struggled to enjoy blogging in the same way, for maybe a few reasons(?): I'm shallow and I love a strong aesthetics, but my strive to achieve a satisfying visual identity superseded any legitimate…