The Round of Introductions You Didn’t Ask For

I’ve been yammering on here at LWON for long enough now that it’s time for readers to get to know me a little more intimately. That means some introductions are in order. We’ll start strong with my buddy Gus. Gus is the Skittle-size hemangioma spooning my liver. As you can imagine, this bundle of excess blood vessels gave me a little scare the first time we met via CT scan, but now we’re pals; I can count on him to be there for the rest of my days. Next up is Clint, my left-ear dehiscence. He showed up during fetal development, or should I say he missed our scheduled meeting, leaving a gap where parts should have come together. As a result, my left ear forever feels full, it clicks and hisses at me, and sometimes my breathing is disturbingly loud in my own head. I get momentary dizzy spells, too. Patching up Clint would require drilling into my skull beneath my ear, so I’ll be living with this developmental blip for the duration. Then there’s Betty and the [Bloody] Dozen, my lung node…