Notes From The Emergency Ward

***Content Warning for mild medical stuff, mention of bloods, damning implications re: that girl being poison, and two guys named Jordan*** I had An Emergency yesterday! My tummybox had been a-twistin’ and a-crampin’ since Friday noon1; this had happened a couple of times previously but 1.) Never lasted more than 24 hours and 2.) Seemed previously to have been triggered by a food sensitivity since it lined up with my accidental consumption of sucralose in an Arnold Palmer that, unbeknownst to me, was Diet. Regardless, I ended up at a Banner facility yesterday and am feeling much better today, and while there I did—as is my nature—document the experience, which I now share to benefit the public good. Having been some days in preparation, a splendid time is guaranteed to all. ~11am Nifty collapsible emesis bags at the check-in desk! How thoughtful! Probably for when they tell you “No, that’s the cost with insurance”. Brief misgendering adventure despite absolutely nothing on my chart or…