RE: closing my loops & summer recently

There is a defiant friction between me and words that I haven't experienced in a long time, as I write (force out) this entry. I avoid naming this fear, but sometimes, naming it becomes the first step to loosen its grip - What if I can never write again? What if I lost my words somewhere in all the chaos of the past two months? For 2026, I set myself the goal of consistency (four to five Bear posts per month), but life doesn't align with your perfectly constructed plans. Often, you're swept along by a whirlwind of unexpected events, and peaceful acceptance becomes less a choice and more a requisite practice. I used to ruminate over every broken routine as evidence of some moral failing, proof that I can't maintain iron discipline. Now I let it mean that things don't always go my way, but it'll still be okay. In April, I wrote about closing opened loops, the unresolved matters we leave buzzing in the background to inattentively drain us. I was determined to close some big ones for May…