Old Glory Daze

Today, we celebrate Independence Day with...the American Flag. O-oh, say can you SEEEE? BYYY the bakery light?How so soundly they failed... to give our flag any meaning: Those brown stripes and blob "stars" ARE a scurr-i-lous sight! And the RED parts they botched... are so def'nitely leaning: And what's that O-VER THEEEERE?! [cymbal crash!!] Did the BAKER NOT CARE? [slide whistle!] A goof, what a sight - it's more THAN I can bear. (Yes. Really.) No WAY does thi-is new-fangled airbru-ush yet blaa-aaaave! [You know, "to blave?" It means "to bluff."][Now, someone fetch me an MLT!][Ahem] For the BAND of the THREEEEEE (red stripes)... And the hoooome...of theeeee....WAAAAAAAVE! (Before you ask: all of today's wrecks were sold right here in the good ol' US of A, on or around American holidays. I also have LOTS more where these came from. [proffering tissue] Tissue, teachers?) Thanks to ToniAnn B., Trace L., Stephanie P., Sarah C., Kelly S., Sharon E., Lori A., Lin Q., & Daniel K. for their…