Just venting about work

I was really hoping for a promotion but I am not getting it. Not this year, at least. I kind of knew already but I was still devastated. It made me questions all the effort, time away from my family, and stress I've sacrified only to not be considered. A few days later, I found out that, at least, I got an exceeds 1. I was trying to make sense of it and wondered if I only received an excellent performance rating because they felt bad for me because of my manager's passing. I tried to reason and reminded myself of how hard I've worked the past year; otherwise I wouldn't have been as bummed out. There were also layoffs last week. So sad. A few people I worked with in the past were impacted. What makes it even worse is that this has been happening every three months or so. It's heartbreaking. As much as I try to not to let the fear get to me, it sneaks up sometimes. I've even thought about maybe seeking another job due to the high involuntary turnover rate -- and not being considered for…