Unrequited Crushes are Stupidly Necessary

As a lover girl through and through, I can’t help but look back at all the stupid stuff I did whenever I had a crush on someone. At a young age, I’ve always just thought of crushes as someone you like and never meant to have. Probably the reason why I didn’t really try, in any aspects of what needs to be done to be in a relationship, I never really did any of those. I was a fan of heartbreaks, and I liked crying a lot – which is stupid because I also get mad that my crushes don’t like me. I fed off of my self-pity, and it surprisingly made me feel alive. One benefit that I can think of is, having been a stupid lover girl in my younger years made me exhausted. At 25, I no longer had the energy to “negotiate” or “compromise.” If I had a hint that a dude doesn’t give the same energy, I’m snapping out of it right away, and look for the next one to flirt with (via text, because I don’t go out.) I had a purpose, and my purpose was clear. If the guys I was talking to then is not giving the…