117: Cardamom Seasoned with Damp Poodle

Yes, there’s been a gap. I would have announced it, but I didn’t know and then every week I thought I might start again. But I didn’t. My apologies. Here’s a chunk of a thing called Without Hinges, With Consent. Nobody mentioned that I’d stink of cardamom seasoned with damp poodle. Whenever you transit to an alien universe, the Portal rearranges your anatomy and biochemistry so you can survive under its different natural laws. A grade D universe like Sieve stretches the definitions of “human” and “survive.” These universes had to be especially valuable for Montague to exploit them. Transit to this universe turned our flesh into something like stone and our hair into this slimy seaweed stuff so I’d depilated before going on duty, but I couldn’t keep myself from running my fingertips across my warm scalp. When a universe lacks a concept you can’t even think of it, but my gut knew I was missing something big. And you never miss your heartbeat until it’s gone. Even the most bizarre…