Many moons ago, just before I moved to Sussex University, I decided to ditch all the unsolicited letters and manuscripts I’ve accumulated over the years about “alternative” theories of relativity, cosmology, and whatnot. I don’t know why I had kept so many of them for so long, but I no longer have most of them. I did keep one or two of the best ones, however. Here’s an example: I could never make head nor tail of this, but sometimes had a vague feeling that it might just be a sort of cosmic Rosetta Stone, offering up the Secrets of the Universe in diverse languages. Sadly, however, it’s more likely that the languages involved are Balderdash, Gibberish and Gobbledegook. At the time I wrote: I regret to announce, therefore, that the plethora of papers telling me why Einstein was wrong, how the Universe is really in the shape of a spiral, how the Great Pyramid of Giza explains the Higgs Boson, and why the Big Bang couldn’t have happened, will have to go to the Great Shredder in the Sky…
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