a few basic signs of major manipulation

one thing i've noticed is that people who try to manipulate a connection instead of really connecting with you often can’t meet you as you are. instead of seeing you for who you are, they try to shape everything around themselves. the connection becomes conditional: you’re only accepted when you fit the role they’ve decided for you. the other thing is that they are always the victim. they're either sick, going through a crisis, or dealing with something that's wrong in their lives. this tactic is obvious when it's done poorly, but if the manipulator is skilled, you may not notice it until you've already been pulled in. honestly, most of the time they don’t even realize they’re doing it. that’s just how they live, what they know, and how they behave. the third major sign is that they criticize you but can’t handle criticism themselves. they expect you to accept their judgments and complaints, but the moment you point out one of their flaws or challenge their behavior, they become…