The Status Is NOT Quo

Wreckporter Adria P. found all of today's cakes in the same bakery, on the same day. And since I know how tempting it is for you optimists to think most of the wrecks here are once-in-a-lifetime flukes, I figured this would be an excellent way for me to break out my "I-Told-You-So" dance. (Which is a lot like my "I-Have-To-Pee-And-We're-Out-Of-TP" dance, but with more jazz hands.) Because people need to realize that the bakery world is a mess, and I just need to rule it.[adjusting goggles]But first, let's take a look at the average daily fare in this Fine Establishment: Bad Horse after some really spicy black bean enchiladas.("Dibs on the festering pile of black goo!")(PRO TIP: "Festering" makes everything funnier.) (Unless the thing is on you, of course. Then, less so. To you. The rest of us will still think it's funny.) The return of the gnarly poop fingers...OF DOOM.I'd also like to point out that Adria sent these in yesterday, and it's April. Is this like a Christmas in July…