shame while struggling

hey, a really vulnerable post incoming. i haven't had the best few days and it is difficult to pinpoint what is going on. that's annoying - i like when the feelings are understood, put into neat little boxes with a neat little solution for each thing. i feel like i am too talkative, too emotional over things i should have no trouble dealing with, too sensitive and too needy. the worst thing about it all is shame. usually, when i struggle, it is very clear what is happening. i'll give you an example: i was in the community where people were intolerant of me because of a trait i cannot change - let's say it was akin to racism. i was crying after each time it happened, felt isolated and sort of like a unwanted cancer cell instead of a human (dramatic, i know, that's how it felt, though). so what did i do? i went though when i had encountered feeling isolated before in my life (school bullying came to mind very quickly), i lived through it, recognized that i cannot change how people treat…