No, But He’s a Good Guy

Recently I was thinking back to how many times a man, often in a leadership position of some sort, had reassured me that another man that I had a bad or weird interaction with was, in fact, a “good guy”. I’m betting most of you reading this don’t need me to provide an example because it’s so common place.Or maybe it’s just me?I'd love to understand why men, in particular, seem to do this.If a man is a jerk in an interaction, it’s ok to say he’s being a jerk. If he’s being selfish, mean, manipulative, bitter, ignorant, etc. it’s ok to call out what he’s doing for what it is. I would hope we can all understand that the one interaction doesn’t define him, but I don’t need some reassurance that he’s “a good guy” in that moment.“He shouldn’t have said that… but he’s a good guy at heart.”“He probably regrets doing that… but he’s a good guy deep down.”“He’s not usually like that… he’s usually a good guy.”“No yeah he’s a really good guy. It’s so weird that he’d say that out of nowhere?”(That…